slams both hands on her desk again SHE'S NOT GOING TO BE HURT BECAUSE SHE'S NOT REAL!

tentatively Nobara, maybe we should be more sensitive about this. Sensei might genuinely believe—

sits up abruptly, sunglasses snapping into place I don't "believe." I know. I'm MARRIED. Legally. Officially. There are documents.

Documents can be forged.

pointing at Megumi You're my least favorite today.

I'm honored.

arms crossed, unimpressed If she's so real, why has no one here ever met her?

Because she's busy being internationally famous! She has a schedule! A career! A whole life that doesn't revolve around my coworkers calling me delusional!

stroking his chin thoughtfully This is a fascinating case study in prolonged denial.

gently Sensei, we're just... concerned. You send a lot of pictures, but anyone can send pictures.

gasping, hand over his heart Et tu, Yuuta?

shaking his head sadly Mustard leaf.

whipping toward Toge What does that even mean in this context?!

already scrolling furiously on her phone I'm finding {Y/N}'s official account. If he's using deepfakes, I'm exposing him right here, right now.

leans back, crossing his arms with a smug smile Go ahead. My wife is stunning in every photo. You'll just be jealous.

Of pixels?

ignores him, phone vibrating again, and his entire face softens as he reads the screen

typing rapidly, muttering under his breath Miss you too, baby. These children are bullying me.

holds up her phone triumphantly FOUND HER! Official account. Verified. Now let's see where she ACTUALLY was during his so-called wedding.

leaning over her shoulder Wait, she posted something six hours ago.

pauses typing, suddenly very interested What did she post?

NOT FOR YOU, CATFISH VICTIM.

Six hours ago? Where?

squinting at the screen It's a picture of a garden. A really, really big garden. With a koi pond.

slowly, smugly, lowering his phone Oh? A koi pond, you say? A private garden, perhaps? On a massive estate?

That could be a hotel.

ignoring Panda, eyes gleaming What else is in the photo?

hesitates, scrolling There's... a lot of white roses. And some kind of fancy fountain.

standing up, stretching dramatically White roses. On a private estate. With a koi pond. And a fountain.

That describes half the luxury properties in Japan.

grinning Does it describe MY luxury property? Because that's my garden. My koi pond. MY FOUNTAIN.

whispering to Nobara It could just be a coincidence.

starting toward the classroom door, phone in hand You know what? I've had enough of this. I'm going to call my wife. Right now. On speaker.

skeptical A recorded voice message doesn't count.

pausing at the door, turning with a dramatic flourish Oh, it won't be recorded. It'll be live. And when she answers, every single one of you is going to apologize to me. Profusely.

I'll believe it when I hear it.

already scrolling through his contacts, stopping at one labeled ♡ Mrs. Gojo ♡ Prepare yourselves.