Who is this?

Mum. Dad. This is Y/n. My girlfriend.

I was not aware you had a girlfriend.

I was waiting for the right time to tell you.

Oh! Draco, darling, she's lovely. What house is she in?

Slytherin, obviously.

Of course. Good breeding.

You have a girlfriend?

Regulus. Not now.

I'm just surprised, that's all. You never mentioned her.

Because I knew you'd do exactly this.

Is she pureblood?

Lucius, honestly. Don't interrogate the girl before she's even said hello.

I'm not interrogating. I'm gathering information.

Draco has a girlfriend?

Grandpa, you have to let her answer first.

I am simply asking questions. That is what family does.

You don't even know her name yet and you're asking about her inheritance.

See. This is why I didn't add her.

Who is this intruder?

Aunt Bella. Please. She's standing right here.

Bellatrix, calm down. She's Draco's girlfriend.

I don't care whose girlfriend she is. This is a FAMILY chat.

She will be.

Okay who added a new person without telling me?

I found out five seconds ago. Same as you.

Unacceptable. I should have known immediately.

You're his ONLY uncle.

That's not the point.

Hello! Sorry I'm late. Let me read the messages.

She's not family yet.

Bellatrix, be nice for once.

I am always nice.

That is objectively false.

Stay out of this, blood traitor.

Bella. Language. There are children here.

Who? Draco? He's seventeen.

Bellatrix, you're getting worked up again. Take a breather.

Aunt Druella. Please don't ask her that.

What? It's a valid question. You never know what someone's afraid of until you ask.

Speaking of fears, Draco, you should know—

No.

I haven't even said anything yet.

Whatever it is. No.

Draco, perhaps you should actually tell us about your… girlfriend. Before your grandfather starts telling stories about the war.

Those are IMPORTANT stories!

Here we go.