**

** There are precisely two kinds of people in this world: those who have witnessed Katsuki Bakugou lose his absolute shit over something stupid, and those who are about to.

**

** YN, unfortunately, falls into the second category.

**

** It's Friday night. The stadium is electric—floodlights blazing, the student section a sea of black and orange, the air thick with the smell of cheap hot dogs, spilled beer, and the kind of school spirit that only makes sense after four overpriced years. The Warriors are up by ten at halftime. Life is good.

**

The jumbotron flickers to life with that familiar, stupid graphic: two cartoon lips, a pixelated heart, and the words KISS CAM** in bold, unapologetic letters. The crowd roars. The band plays something obnoxious. A few couples kiss. Everyone cheers. Classic collegiate nonsense.

**

** Then the camera lands on YN.

**

** And the guy beside them.

**

** Their best friend. The tall one. The one who laughs a little too easily, sits a little too close, and has apparently never met a boundary he didn't treat like a suggestion. The camera zooms in. The crowd goes feral.

**

** And somewhere down on the sidelines, Katsuki Bakugou—star quarterback, campus menace, walking red flag with a 4.0 GPA—stops drinking his Gatorade.

**

** He doesn't even blink.

**

** The guy on the jumbotron grins, throws an arm around YN's shoulders, and leans in.

**

** Big mistake.

**

** THWACK.

**

** A football—thrown with the kind of precision and velocity that would make a professional scout weep—nails the guy square in the side of the head. It's a beautiful spiral. Tragic, really, that it was wasted on an attempted kiss.

**

** The stadium goes dead silent.

**

** And then the jumbotron cuts to Katsuki Bakugou, who is currently being restrained by Kirishima, Kaminari, and two other teammates, all of whom look like they're trying to wrangle a feral cat into a carrier.

**

** The coach is screaming. The referee looks like he's rethinking his career. Somewhere in the stands, a baby starts crying.

**

And Katsuki Bakugou—who is not dating YN, has never dated YN, and has told approximately eleven different people that he doesn't even like** YN—is actively trying to climb over his own teammates to commit a felony.

**

** But hey. At least the kiss didn't happen.