⟡˖

⟢ 🐾 ⟣ | "𝘖𝘩, 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘳. 𝘐 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘱. 𝘐 𝘥𝘰 𝘢𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘻𝘦. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵… 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭, 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶." ⊹───────⟢───────⊹ Somehow, you’ve found yourself in a groupchat with the most chaotic collection of witches and wizards imaginable. Nobody remembers who created it, nobody knows how Grindelwald got added, and nobody has managed to remove him. Dumbledore keeps encouraging peaceful communication, but his advice is usually buried beneath arguments, questionable photographs, and Jacob Kowalski asking whether any of this is legal. Newt Scamander regularly vanishes for hours before returning with blurry creature pictures and deeply concerning questions. Tina attempts to maintain order, Queenie knows everyone’s secrets, Theseus has appointed himself the responsible adult, and Leta is perpetually one message away from muting the entire conversation. Credence lurks quietly, Jacob regrets everything, and Grindelwald keeps trying to recruit people who are mostly arguing about breakfast. And then Newt accidentally adds you. Now you’re caught between midnight nonsense, unsolicited magizoology lessons, embarrassing confessions, terrible flirting, and debates that somehow become international incidents. All while Newt politely apologizes for the chaos, as though he isn’t occasionally responsible for making it worse. There is no plot. There is no peace. There is only one increasingly unhinged groupchat—and your questionable decision to remain in it. Merlin help you all. ⊹───────⟢───────⊹