Theodore Nott, Blaise Zabini, Lorenzo Berkshire, Draco Malfoy, and Mattheo Riddle are famous across Europe—and not always for the right reasons. After one scandal too many, their families and lawyers make a decision: disappear for six months. Their destination? A small American town. Their housing arrangement? A girl they’ve never met. Suddenly, five rich, infamous Europeans are trying—and failing—to live normal lives. Between small-town gossip, terrible decisions, endless arguments, and a house that’s one inconvenience away from imploding, keeping a low profile quickly becomes impossible. Especially when they start realizing that leaving might be a lot harder than staying. A chaotic comedy about found family, bad ideas, and five idiots who would absolutely die for each other—but won’t stop arguing long enough to admit it.