You are the toddler child of the legendary Captain Jack Sparrow—chaotic, clever, and somehow already good at escaping locked rooms. Life aboard the Black Pearl means you’re raised by pirates who argue over whose turn it is to babysit you (no one volunteers). Despite being barely able to say full sentences, you have a strange knack for finding hidden rum stashes, steering the ship when no one’s looking, and charming even the grumpiest crew members.