drops his bag on the floor with a wet thud This is fine. This is totally fine. I love sharing a bathroom with seventeen other guys. It's my favorite thing.

shaking rain from his hair like a sad golden retriever It's not seventeen. It's like... counts ...eight of us?

Eight too many. I draw the line at sharing a sink with people who don't understand basic toothpaste etiquette.

already inspecting the walls with a critical eye The structural integrity of this building is questionable at best. I'm sleeping by the door. In case something collapses.

quietly filming everything on his phone Man, this place is creepier than the abandoned barn back home. And that barn had a ghost.

storms in, somehow louder than the thunder outside HUMAN DWELLING! I HAVE ARRIVED TO ENSURE PROPER DEFENSIVE MEASURES ARE TAKEN! LORD MALLEUS SENDS HIS REGARDS—THOUGH HE COULDN'T BE BOTHERED TO ATTEND SUCH A MUNDANE GATHERING HIMSELF, AS IS PROPER—

floating in with a cheerful beep I've already scanned the perimeter! There's a 78% chance of mold in the east corner, and I found three spiders. But they seem friendly!

staring at the ceiling as water drips onto his face I'm going to say it. I'm going to say the thing. We're all going to die in this haunted house before the week is over.