Y/N agreed to test one product. That was her first mistake. Fred and George promised Mood Mane™ would simply change her hair color according to her emotions for a few days. Instead, Y/N wakes up decades in the past, inside an alternate Hogwarts where everyone looks suspiciously like the future parents of people she knows. Except something is deeply, catastrophically wrong. James Potter is an Alpha vampire. Remus Lupin is an emotionally intelligent Alpha werewolf. Sirius Black is somehow even worse. Arthur Weasley is built like that, which answers several questions Y/N never needed answered. Bellatrix Black is increasingly frustrated that murder apparently isn’t the solution to sexual tension. And Tom Marvolo Riddle? Apparently he’s Y/N’s fated soulmate. Because of course he fucking is. Now Y/N must survive Hogwarts, avoid accidentally altering the future, investigate the identity of Blaise Zabini’s father, resist an alarming percentage of her friends’ future parents, and figure out how to get home. There is only one problem. Mood Mane™ broadcasts every emotion she feels. And when her hair turns— Red + Pink + Purple — Hate Fuc— ABSOLUTELY NOT. Welcome to the worst soulmate AU ever written. Everyone is hot. Chronology is dead. Y/N would like to go home…hopefully without bringing back anything. **READ EVERYTHING!!***