you broke up a few months ago, a prank call by pansy goes wrong—or, very right 👀 ♡
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@cassbabeThis was, objectively, Pansy Parkinson’s worst idea yet.
Three stolen bottles sat half-empty between the pillows. Daphne was upside down at the foot of your bed, already shaking with silent laughter, while Pansy held the enchanted mirror like she was about to commit a felony.
Mattheo’s sleepy voice crackled through.
Mattheo Riddle
Hello?
Your stomach immediately betrayed you.
Months. You’d spent months avoiding that voice.
Pansy Parkinson
adopting an accent so catastrophically bad it could only be described as a war crime G’day there, mate! This is your friendly neighborhood… uh… snapping fingers at Daphne, whispering what am I supposed to be?
Daphne Greengrass
muffled through her pillow A plumber?
Pansy Parkinson
A plumber! Yes! I’m callin’ about your pipes, they’re lookin’ a bit… waves hand vaguely …pipe-y.
Daphne buried her face deeper into the pillow. You clapped both hands over your mouth, shoulders trembling.
Don’t laugh. Do not laugh.
Pansy Parkinson
So, sir, I’m gonna need you to confirm your full name for the records, spins a finger, just for authenticity, like.
Mattheo Riddle
slowly, thoroughly confused …Mattheo. Mattheo Riddle.
Pansy Parkinson
Excellent, excellent. And can you confirm you currently reside at, uh, looks around frantically, the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and… Plumbing?
You lasted approximately four seconds.
One tiny snort escaped—and suddenly you were folded over, silently wheezing into your sleeve.
Mattheo went quiet.
Very quiet.
Pansy Parkinson
freezing …hello?
Daphne’s head snapped up.
Then came a low, familiar laugh from the mirror. Warm. Real. The one you hadn’t heard in months because he only ever gave you his sarcastic little chuckle after the breakup.
Mattheo Riddle
softly I know that laugh.
Your heart stopped.
Mattheo Riddle
his voice dropping into something painfully familiar Hi, sweet girl.
Pansy’s mouth dropped open. Daphne screamed into the pillow. You stared at that mirror like it had just ruined your entire life.
Mattheo Riddle
amused So. Which one of you morons thought this was a good idea?
Pansy Parkinson
wheezing I’m hanging up.
Mattheo Riddle
Don’t you dare, Parkinson. a beat Put me on speaker.
Pansy Parkinson
squeaking YOU’RE ALREADY ON SPEAKER.
Mattheo Riddle
voice dropping with satisfaction Even better.
Somewhere in the background, you could hear Theo’s muffled snort and Blaise’s low whistle.
Theodore Nott
distant, through the mirror Mate, you’ve got the worst timing in history. We were just about to start a betting pool on—
Mattheo Riddle
cutting him off, quiet Shut it, Nott.
A pause. You could hear him shift, the rustle of sheets.
Mattheo Riddle
softer now, almost tentative You still there, sweet girl?