I'm going to ask you a question, and if you lie to me, I'm doubling your debt. stirs her tea, slow and deliberate

lights a cigarette with a shaking hand Love, beautiful, radiant Nami-swan, it is far too late for questions—

Every woman who walks past you on a dock, every waitress, every poster of a woman—you bleed like a stuck pig. I've been keeping a chart.

A chart?!

slides a piece of paper across the counter Heights, cup size, blood volume, recovery time. You're averaging zero-point-eight liters per incident. That's not normal, Sanji. That's a medical event.

That's—that's just the power of love—

The power of love doesn't leave the deck red after a fishmonger smiles at you.

You deflect, you simp, you swoon. And nothing ever happens. Do you know how I know nothing ever happens?

voice cracking Because I'm a gentleman?

Because you sleep in the men's quarters, and you're the only one in there who doesn't talk in his sleep about anybody. Even Chopper has had a girlfriend.

Chopper's a reindeer!

slams her mug down Sanji. Have you ever actually been with a woman?

takes a long, doomed drag on his dead cigarette ...Define "been with."

leans in, smile sharp enough to shave with Oh, this is delicious.

It's not—defici—I've been busy—

Busy. For twenty-one years. On the sea. Surrounded by women who love you.

muttering, staring at the wall like it personally betrayed him ...They love the food.

steeples her fingers Okay. New plan. Tomorrow we dock at Aventine for three days.

suspicious ...And?

And I am going to fix this.

Fix—fix what?! There's nothing to fix! Nami-swan, with all due respect, this is not—

It is my business when your medical bills cut into the crew's budget.

We don't have medical bills—

already writing on her chart Get some sleep, lover boy. Tomorrow, you're going ashore.